Greetings from Kansas! I've been busy snuggling my newest niece for five days now. She sure is a little sweetheart, and I've thoroughly enjoyed every little snuggle, but I miss my big boy and am ready to snuggle him up now. Cliff has been calling me every night and letting me talk to Gavin. When I told Gavin tonight that I was excited to see him tomorrow and was going to give him lots of hugs and kisses, he said "I run away", which is his newest silly thing to say and do. I think I started it when I said one time, "Why do you always run away when I want to take your picture?" So, he started saying, "I run away" or rather, "I wun away" and he runs to the furthest wall or corner of the room and stands with his back up against the wall or the door and looks at me with a surprised look on his face. It's pretty amusing.
When I talked to Gavin last night via Skype, he was a little tired and ready for bed and something set off the tears. The Skype video allowed me to see his sad little pouty lower lip and real tears running down his cheeks as he called out "Mommy". That was enough to set me off and soon I was a fountain. I missed my little guy, but more concerning was that I was afraid he missed me. I thought he was crying not because he knew he missed me, but because he did miss me and his little life had been tilted just a little off kilter.
I love that I can go away for several days and I know he is in the best hands. I know that Cliff is an amazing Dad and they got to spend Saturday and Sunday together, as well as each of the evenings since I left. I know that his days at daycare on Friday and on Monday were regular daycare days and that his cousin Dana watching him today and for awhile Sunday morning was a welcome change. I know that his Grandma Jennings will get him up out of bed tomorrow and he will smile with excitement to see her. I know he is well cared for. But, I also know that he and I haven't had our bedtime routine snuggle since I left. He has snuggled with Daddy though. I know that I haven't gotten to read him his books or kiss his little head, even though I know Cliff has been reading lots of books to him. Dana said they read a lot of books on Sunday morning, and I am sure they read a lot again today. Today, she took him outside early in the morning and he got to swing in his swing by the porch. Today, Cliff worked from home so he got to share breakfast with them and eat lunch together. I know Gavin is doing fine and honestly, I'm handling being away from him better than I thought I would. I was afraid I'd be a wreck by today, but I'm okay - just really looking forward to getting him up from his nap tomorrow and getting to kiss his boyish little head and let him run his hand through my hair as I hug him and hold him!
Seeing and holding little baby Amelija does make me both miss the days when Gavin was a tiny little critter of a baby and at the same time feel so glad that he is so interactive now and that I can talk with him and play with him and appreciate his growing personality. He really is a big boy and he has a fun loving and goofy character. He seems bigger and bigger each time I look at him. He seems huge when I lift him to get him in his carseat or when I try to hold him on my lap and I can't see over his head to read the pages of a book. He is not even two years old yet, and he is a big, big boy. He is our big boy and I'm afraid of him growing up too fast, growing out of our grasp, and yet I love to see him grow and learn and discover his world.
He has taken a few very big steps recently. I wrote about his use of the potty chair, which has become more and more frequent, with two or three successful "sittings" a day, but the other change he recently made is sleeping in the big boy bed. There has been a twin bed in his room since before there was even a crib in that room. That was our spare bedroom and we never took the bed out when we moved him in. We figured it would be nice to have a bed in there for if we needed to lay down in there in case he was sick or something and needed us closer than our room. He has always loved to play on that bed, read books on that bed, and snuggle up on it. For a long time, when we would get him out of his crib in the morning, he would say "bed" and want to lay on the bed for awhile. We had offered to let him nap in the big bed a few times and he wanted to, but after awhile he would want to get back in his crib. About a week and a half ago, he decided he wanted to sleep in the big bed one night. He did well. In the last week and a half, he slept in his crib for two naps, but has otherwise been in his bed for every night and every nap. What a big boy!
Where did my squirmy little critter of a baby go? He's turning into a nice big boy that I am so proud of and so love!